Me becoming a coach was my parents’ greatest fear. Maybe it’s because in Soviet Union it was the epitome of a non-intellectual. But as Murphy’s law goes, that is exactly what I became.
I was first asked to coach when I was only in tenth grade, by my Kung Fu studio. I declined. But six years later, I was an assistant coach while still taking classes at UCSD, waking up at 5 am in order to drive kids to tournaments.
I walked into my old high school wrestling room only to practice a little. Within days, I realized that with a few words and a demonstration, I could create a huge change in a teenager’s ability to wrestle as well as their appreciation for the sport.
Coaching is like teaching but more. As a teacher you have four to six sets of 30 kids for 30-90 minutes a day. That’s 120 to 180 kids every day. You might get to know individuals. You might connect with one or two. When you coach on the other hand, you have 30-40 kids for 2 hours a day during practice and then 8 hours or more during matches. You meet their parents, you see their struggles. You see them grow. You don’t have them for a semester and then that’s the end, you have them for two, three, or four years. Sometimes they finish high school and come around for many more years and join the staff.
Some of my wrestlers added me on social media years later and I added my coaches. We stay in touch, because a mark has been made.
Wrestling isn’t easy. Coaching wrestling is harder. As an assistant coach you have to show up for the 10-12 hour long tournaments. You find ways to connect to individuals. Help them figure out the new moves and get over the blocks.
As a head coach you do all that but now you have to think about the much bigger picture: their health, their season, finding new wrestlers, filling in the roster, making sure they are doing well in school, that you help them reach their goals. You interact with parents, media, community, other coaches and of course the staff.
It becomes a political and managerial job as you lead not just the wrestling team but the coaching staff and all of the people who are connected with the program. You have to raise funds and oversee a budget and make sure that deadlines are met and equipment is serviced.
Coaching wrestling helped elevate my management and organization skills. It helped elevate my political skills. But most of all, coaching wrestling is fulfilling.
I’ll never forget when Elijah Vinoray won his Master’s Championship match. Coach Bernie and I shed tears of happiness when he and his brother qualified for state championships, something the school hasn’t done in over a decade. This was a year after a devastating neck injury that only a wrestler could walk off the mat without need of an ambulance and recover from in six months.
When Elijah won by fall at 5:59 we were beyond ecstatic. Elijah came up to me after the match and lifted me so high I thought my heels would touch the ceiling. It’s that kind of feeling of pride and accomplishment, that you helped someone realize their potential to the best of their current abilities, that you showed them that with hard work anything is possible, that’s why we coach, that’s why people should coach. Because there are never too many good role models for the next generation, there is no such thing as regret of passing on your experience and talents.
Coaching is hard, coaching well is even harder. But one does not become good at walking overnight. So take a chance, join a program, give a little of yourself, to the next generation. It will be worth it I promise.
Henry-Wrestling 